AND I WONDER | No Girls Allowed? Boys Only?

friendships
...I wished I remembered where I found this pic so I could credit properly...but I love it...

“I can’t deal with chicks. They always hating on me.”

I once heard a girl say that she didn’t get along with other females and that she would much rather deal with guys because there’s never any competition. She expressed that having females as friends just opened her up to experiencing hate. Part of me understood, but the other part just couldn’t comprehend the whole thought.

I wanted to jump in the conversation to ask her a few things. One, how was she treating other females? Two, where was she meeting these women? Three, what has she done to try to develop those friendships, if anything all? And four, how many of those females has she wronged? But I kept my mouth shut.

I have more male friends than I do female friends and I speak to them regularly. My dudes make me laugh. They keep it real and honest with me at all times. And they call me out on my BS when I need a reality check. There’s no filter with them.

But, there are times when life is just not on the up and up and all I want to do is complain and cry about who wronged me or how things aren’t panning out the way I want them to. Those are times when I don’t need to hear, “Come on Misha, man-up dude!”

I’m a female with emotions that need to be released, dammit! Sometimes, I just need to hear, “Girl, it’s ok, the same thing happened to me. You’ll be all right; you’re still a fab chick. You got this!” That’s where my girls come into play. That’s when having female friends is awesome.

I mean it gets really hard to male bash and complain about what “he” didn’t do or say to your guy friends. **laughs** I’m kidding, of course I don’t male bash! ;-) But that’s where my girls are needed. We have cocktails and swap dating horror stories.

I personally think every Fab Chick should have an arsenal of Fab Chick friends. I feel it’s important to have someone you can relate to, talk about anything with and cry on the shoulders of. I mean, who else can you plot taking over the world fabulously with and gush about the latest must-haves?

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve learned quite a bit about guys from my dudes. But I love the balance of being great friends with males and females. I need them both.

Don’t you? Do you think it’s important for females to have a network of other female friends? Or is a Rolodex filled with guys only just as okay? Could you live without having girlfriends?

3 comments:

Nadia Conner 18.5.11  

Good Morning Misha!
I love THIS post!!! It is so REAL & True. I'm going to try to keep it short and simple...remember I said I WILL TRY. Lol

In my past I've gone through situations where I was involved with the cattiness that females seem to be KNOWN for.

The questions that you wanted to ask her:

"One, how was she treating other females? Two, where was she meeting these women? Three, what has she done to try to develop those friendships, if anything all? And four, how many of those females has she wronged?"

Are questions that all females should ask themselves including myself after being a victim to drama that seems to occur within women.

I was just speaking about this subject to my friends not too long ago about how it seems as though when a female goes through any type of confontation with other females she wants to seclude herself from having friendships with any NEW females in order to avoid future drama, I also realized that it's usually the females who say "I don't have female friends, they don't bring nothing but drama" who tend to be the one's that bring drama with them.

When I look back on what I've gone through in the past, and having to start all over with my friendships I've learned that it is all about the COMPANY that you KEEP. Your friends should be a reflection of YOU so that it is easier to relate to them.

Keep friends who are motivated, determined, ambitious, etc....and not one's who feed off drama as a hidden way of just seeking attention...in the WRONG way.

I don't have a lot of "male" friends but the one's that I do have I enjoy, HOWEVER the moments when I want to go to the nail shop or to the mall to check out the new selection at Bakers...that is something that I would prefer to do w/ one of my girlfriends.

K now I'm DONE..lol :)

Kerissa 2.6.11  

I think we all have had bad experiences with females for one reason or another. I have and I've gotten over it. My besties and I have been riding since we met in preschool and today we still celebrate our birthdays together yearly.
I have male friends (not as many as you..giggles) and I like what they offer as well. My oldest brother keeps it 1000 with me and like you I appreciate the other perspective.
With that being noted, I love my girlfriends!

CeCe 6.6.11  

Misha this is such a great topic for discussion! It's interesting because I've never actually had a solid group of male friends. Ever since I was little, I've always had tight girlfriends. Boys were yucky, or just didn't understand (in my opinion) so I kept my girlfriends close. I've always marveled at women who have an arsenal of male friends at their beck and call. I dunno I guess I'm old fashion in my assumption that the "just friends" thing with boys and girls is a myth but so many other women I know swear it's possible.

Either way, I'm grateful for friends in general. But for me, women just "get" me more than men do.